001 Who IS the Resolute Woman?

In 20 years of coaching, training, and speaking with women about their insecurities, their fears, their worries… all the things that keep them up at night (or at least cause them to wake up in a cold sweat every now and then; questioning their right to even exist), there seemed to be one common denominator. 

There was a lot of “waiting and seeing.”

I’ll wait and see…
What she does
What the doctors say 
If he goes
How much it costs
How much time it will take
What my mother thinks
If I get promoted
Who else will be there
…to name a few.

What is a RESOLUTE WOMAN? 

Merriam-Webster tells us the definitions as follows: 

RESOLUTE

adjective
res·​o·​lute ˈre-zə-ˌlüt  
1: marked by firm determination: RESOLVED; a resolute character
2: BOLD, STEADY”

woman
noun
wom·​an ˈwu̇-mən  especially Southern ˈwō-  or ˈwə- 

Plural women ˈwi-mən 
1: an ADULT FEMALE person

Now that we’re all on the same page, I ask you, “Are you a bold, steady and resolved woman? If not, why not? And don’t you want that for yourself? How different would your life be if you felt that you were?

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe gave us this quote: “Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.” 

It took me (honestly) several decades before I truly understood what it meant.

When I was 17 years old and represented Kentucky at the Miss Teen USA pageant, the contestants brought small gifts to give to all of the state representatives.One of the contestants gifted a lovely printing of that quote in its entirety. For the life of me, I cannot recall which state representative it was … but I owe her a debt of gratitude. I still have that print. I haven’t always followed its guidance but I can attest to the fact that boldness does, indeed, have genius and power in it. Our “genius” is often diluted or bastardized by the layers of opinions tossed upon it once laid out for the “waiting and seeing” of what others think. 

Does your mother, brother, girlfriend or boyfriend actually know (beyond a shadow of a doubt) that:

Your book will fail
You’ll only get passed over
You’ll just gain weight
You’ll lose friends
Your clients will leave
He won’t want you anymore
She’ll only take advantage of you
No one will love you 
No one will pay you that
You can’t possibly be successful there

The answer? 

No. 

They do not. 

Unless someone else has done the actual thing you are thinking about doing (and waiting and seeing on)…it’s all just opinions. And we all know everyone has one (and how they usually smell). 

This Week’s Challenge: 

Be on the lookout for moments where you are “waiting and seeing” and ask yourself what would your choice or course of action be if you simply made a DECISION that you would stand firm in? 

What would that look like? 
What actions would you take? 
What do you perceive to be the outcome of those actions? 
What fears are standing in your way, and are they rational ones?

By the way, I took home First Runner-Up at that nationally televised pageant…this little ol’ girl from Kentucky. That felt pretty bold at the time. 

Resolutely Yours,

Kristie